did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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