Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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