How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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