Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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